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1. Making you my everything. Allowing you to become such a big part of my world that I can no longer fathom a world without you. You became my reason for happiness. My mood depended on your actions. I should’ve known you can’t count on something as dispensable as another person’s actions.
2. Apologizing for things I didn’t do. Putting you on a pedestal, and believing that you could do no wrong. You did plenty wrong. I should not have apologized as many times as I did. I should not have forgiven you as many times as I did.
3. Blaming you for everything. Most of our problems were because I expected such great things out of you. I was easily let down. I have come to terms with the fact that you are human. I am human too. And we all make mistakes sometimes.
4. Allowing you to walk all over me. I had no respect for myself. You used me for anything you wanted and I let you. I know now I must work on my self worth. It is not all about you. I am important too.
5. Thinking you loved me too. People always tell me we would be perfect together. I listened to them when I should have known if you felt the same way about me you would’ve acted on those feelings.
6. Not walking away when I should’ve. God I should’ve cut you out of my life so many fucking times. But I never left your side. You were so lucky to have me. I deserved better.
7. Making you out to sound like a bad person when in reality, just because you do not love me the way I love you does not mean you don’t love me with all that you have. And it does not make you a bad person."
My cat came home today! That was a stressful few days.
Now I want to ride more roller coasters. I work everyday this week but tomorrow so I think I’ll go next week at some point. Solo theme park trips can be fun, right?
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